TTC

I wrote a month or so ago, that I'm done trying. I was done....in my head, I was just tired of it, and frustrated. The thing is....my Dr put me on clomid. I didn't stop taking them. I'm the type of person that goes by the rules and when I don't, I get punished, lol. I'm not sure, but I have always been that way. I kept taking them, and me and husband still BD'ed. Well....I'm going on my 4th round of clomid and still not pregnant, so I called my Dr up and asked him if I could up the dose. I am now taking 100mg of clomid. I don't know if this will work or not, but I have read that actually some women doesn't respond to 50mg at all, and then when they upped the dose it worked!!! If it works or not, I still leave it in Gods hands. Mark and I have prayed about continuing with clomid and we both have felt like I should. NOW................................that it is summer......hopefully we can BD like we WERE SUPPOSED TOO, lol. There is a way you are suppose to BD on clomid and since our hours were way off, it was really impossible. I am going to try and make this work this month and we shall see. Who knows....this might be a March 1st baby, or we will move on to the next month. I do want to say this......if I'm not pregnant this month...I most likely will go to the Dr and try for a IUI. I don't want to be doing all this when school is in session. I think it would just be easier if I did this, this summer. But if its not Gods will, then I think I will just stop doing everything and shoot myself.....I'm just kidding, lol......its all in Gods hands!!!!! I will leave it at that. Before I do anything, or we.....we pray about it....to see if its the right thing to do. Each and every step we have done to try and make a baby, we have prayed as a couple, as children of God, and as a future mother and father. We want what God intends and what God has planned.....but you never know why I am going through this and what God is trying to teach me. Maybe what I'm going through, I can help someone later in life, or here and now. I just hope at the end of all this.....SOON!!!!..... I will get to carry, hold, love, and raise a beautiful, healthy, perfect baby!!!!