It seems like when things start going your way and you seem to be getting into a good place.....things start going wrong. I'm content with my life, but it seems like everyone else around me is distant and/or something is going on with them. I know it seems like in this life, there are more wrong things going on then smooth sailing, but I know that's just the facts of life.
As kids we want to be older and we cant wait for no one to tell us what to do, but man.....I'm going to sit my kids down and tell them the truths and realities of being an adult and everything that comes along with it. My mom was good at not telling me when we were in low places because she didn't want me to worry and I know I will be the same, but when they say, "I cant wait till I'm older, so no one can tell me what to do," then mommy and child will have a long talk about reality, whether or not they agree or want to listen!!
I know my life is falling into place the way God has planned and I was telling a friend tonight....no matter what in life, especially the worst time, you have to think, its for a reason, a purpose, a lesson, an understanding of what it might be.
I have to think that me losing my mom, me getting cancer, losing my 3 babies, not being able to get pregnant, and my husband walking out and never looking back, was for a reason. I would not be sitting here in this position at this time writing this, if none of those things happened. Think about that for a second.
I was with my friend last night and the person in front of us didn't move and we missed the light. She got so mad, but I am always reminded that, maybe that was Gods plan....maybe if we went thru we would of gotten in a car accident, or a ticket, or whatever......those 2 minutes was lost to where we were going to our destination and everything happened to plan. If you really get into deep thought about it, its an amazing way of looking at your life and everyone in it.
One day I was going down the street and looked up in the mirror and looked down and there was a 1-2 year old almost in the middle of the line pushing something, because he could barely walk. I swerved and missed him, honked the horn multiple times, looked around and all there was, was an older boy, maybe 7 looking at me. The child slowly turns around and looks at me. I literally could feel me running over that child and realized at that moment what impact that would of done in my life for the rest of my life. Guilty, or not.....I would be devastated. I got so mad at wherever the parents were, but was on my way to work and didn't have time to stop and see or tell them. That moment changed me a little bit.....in a way....it was like my life flashed before my eyes of what it could of been.
I'm about to go....I wanted to make this longer, but I don't know when I'm going to be able to finish!!! Until then my friends.....God Bless!!
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