Catching up

I wasn't going to write today, but noticed that its been since Friday since I last wrote. Alot has been going on with me. Its crazy, how you hold on to the past and pray for God to set you free, that you don't even have to do anything. The people you were holding on too, show their colors, and mind you, their not so pretty. Even my friend told me tonight, maybe God is showing things you haven't seen before in these people. Its true, I guess love is blind. But its okay :) I'm a happy person. I am truly happy and I have the most amazing friends in the world. Who knew, that single life would actually be fun and enjoyable? I'm having this party coming up this Friday and I'm sooooooooo ecstatic!!!! Its been motivating me to get my bathroom done that I had started Christmas of 2010. I had started it right before Mark left. Then after he left, my mind wasn't in the right place and now I'm good!!! I feel so good getting this bathroom done and doing my yard every week. I don't know what it is about doing my yard, but I love it! Each time, I do a little bit more. I cut some much needed bushes and trees back Monday and mowed and all that good stuff.

Last Saturday with our crazy weather, a part of my wooden fence blew down. I got it rigged standing up, but it needs to be fixed. I am praying for someone to help me with it, since the person I asked backed out, or lets say, didn't answer my phone or show up. I was thinking about that today, how people will say they will help you or do something and they just back out or don't do it. I say this!!!!.......grow some balls!!!!! If you don't want to do something, say...." I don't want to do it" or "I cant" or whatever that you want to say. When someone asks me to do something or help them, and I'm not 100% sure if I can or want too, IF I say yes, Ill still tell them to have a back up person available if somehow I cant make it. Just so, they wont fully depend on me and be screwed. That's what this person did to me......and it just showed me he hasn't changed!!!! That's all I'm going to say!!!

Now onto happy things.....God has been showing me the past few days of the man that I "don't" want. God has been just telling me, that he has this man made for me, like I'm a glove and this other man is a glove and one day, we are going to find each others match and it will be joined to God as one. Do you realize what great feeling that is? That my soulmate is out there, hopefully praying and waiting on me. Yes, I said Soulmate! I know alot of people don't believe that God has destined one person for them, and it may not be entirely true. I think everyones story is different and what God has for them, but I clearly feel God is telling me, there is ONE man and if I just wait for Gods timing, we will be together. Its kinda crazy how I'm excited how my story is going to play out. I know God has already written my story, but I know how imperfect I may be, this one man will look at my flaws and craziness and love it and vise versa with him. I just know we are going to be two puzzle pieces that are going to match up perfectly. Im not saying we are going to have a perfect life or we wont fight or argue, but I know its going to be different than any of my past relationships. Hes going to be "the one". The one who I was intended to marry all along. I want to hope and pray that we will have a family and grow old together or until God takes us home.

I want that connection, that bond, that tenderly touch like I got from Cass. I want that deep love, stand by my side through all the bad and provide for me like I got from Mark. I want it all and more all combined into one man. I want God to be first in our marriage, no matter what! When the other is weak or is slacking on the path, I want the other person to pull us in and pray with us to make us stay on the walk with God. And you know what????? I know there is someone out there for me, just like that!!

Mark and Cass are good men, but wernt made for me. I hope they can make another woman happy and she can make them happy in this life. I wish them nothing but happiness in this life!!! But Ive moved on.....and it feels.......great!!!! Freeing!!!! Exciting!!!!!


I saw this on my facebook:

It sounds harsh, but you cannot keep every friend you’ve ever made. People and priorities change. As some relationships fade others will grow. Appreciate the possibility of new relationships as you naturally let go of old ones that no longer work. Trust your judgment. Embrace new relationships, knowing that you are entering into unfamiliar territory. Be ready to learn, be ready for a challenge, and be ready to meet someone that might just change your life forever....:)

This week, I don't know what it was, but on my facebook, so many things were posted about letting go of things.....is God telling me something? :)

The third picture, funny story to it. My friend and I both sent it to each other in a text at the exact same time. We were both thinking I'm sure, wait....what? But hers looks different than mine on how we send it, so we both knew the other person was sending it!!!! Okay, now its time for me to go shower, bible study and go to bed considering its 3:00 am. Goodnight my lovely friends!!